The other day I caught myself comparing my life with this new friend that I had just met. Underline, just met. I went on to admire her life, envying it even and then compared it to mine…ah, mistake!

Pause here a little…

See, for someone to be successfully where they are, there has to be a background.

History.

Struggles.

Pain.

Sweat.

Patience.

Prayers.

And then…breakthroughs.

I completely forgot about that wisdom that apparently I had :)

I’m sure in your lifetime you have been in this situation before. Subconsciously comparing your life with that of another person that you know or not know.

Listen, let me give you some grace and hopefully you do that to yourself too.

You, too, have a background.
You have a history.
You have experiences that explain why you’re not where someone else is.
And those experiences are valid and important to keep in mind.
They are full of joy, pain, lessons, growth, and meaning.

Your pathway and the pathway of the person you’re comparing yourself to are completely different. So, the outcome cannot be the same.

Which means… you cannot compare your life to another person’s life.
And I’m saying this while speaking to myself, too.
Because comparison truly is the thief of joy.

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on my own journey.
I used to live here in the U.S. then around 2022, I went back home- Kenya.
I paused everything here.

Progress.

Plans.

Stability.

I stepped away from it all.

When I came back this past year, I had to start again from where I left. You know how hard and different that can be.

Unpause.

So I was telling you how I recently visited someone we had just met. She lives in a beautiful neighborhood. Young. Has a beautiful home.
From my point of view, it looked like she had “made it.” You know, living in the exact words of American Dream.

And immediately… I compared.

I thought about how I’m going back to my apartment.

How I’m in the rebuilding phase.

The patience stage.

Where victories feel so far.

My life suddenly felt small. I felt a quiet sadness creep in. Thankful for my boys, I was distracted so fast!

Anyways, later that day, while driving to work, I caught myself. I played back my life from when I had left it in 22′ and what a beautiful thought! I couldn’t help but count my blessings.

I felt light again. Grateful.

Listen…
That person we are comparing our amazing life to;- we don’t know what they have been through to get where they are. The struggles, the sweat, the joys, all of them. We don’t know!

Looking at my life…

If I had stayed in the U.S. all those years, maybe I’d be leading a different successful life. Maybe not.
But I didn’t stay.

I took that chance and crossed the oceans. I went to Kenya.

I lived a wonderful fun life there.

I made memories with my boys and family.

They met their extended family.

We laughed.

We grew.

We had a good, good time!

We experienced something priceless.

That season matters.

That season is part of my story.

And this life that you and I are in right now?
It’s not a failure.
It’s a beginning.
Maybe next year.
Maybe the year after, we’ll be where we hope to be.
But even if we’re not…
We are still moving forward. Believe it!

We all take different paths.
Some look faster.
Some look slower.
But they are all still paths.
So today, let’s choose to be grateful for what we have.
Let’s choose to honor our journey.
To stop being unfair to ourselves.
To keep showing up.
To keep working.
To keep believing.
Because where we are right now is not where we’ll always be. One day, we’ll look back and realize…this was growth!